Tuesday, October 2, 2012

I *Heart* My Public Library.

Dear Church of Scientology,

I thought you'd be interested to see the book sale shelf at my local public library:

These books have been sitting untouched for 8 weeks. Your attempts to legitimize the Church of Scientology by inundating public library collections with your founder's poorly written science fiction oeuvre, has failed. People are increasingly aware that Scientology is an evil, mind-control cult.

Here's what you didn't take into account:

- librarians are generally savvy about trends in pop culture which heavily influence their patrons' tastes and interests. Translation: librarians are well-educated and know about L. Ron, Tom Cruise, and David Miscavige and aren't going to be pawns in your silly PR game, and
- public libraries don't have an infinite amount of room. They're not going to give up a chunk of shelf space to books that are never going to be checked out. The only people who read buy L. Ron's books are Scientologists who have been directed by their "church" to purchase the books so that they don't go out of print.

 Our librarian did enter one single L. Ron tome into the collection. It's proving much less popular than Janet Reitman's Inside Scientology: The Story of America's Most Secretive Religion. Oooh. That's gotta sting, huh?




  1. Scientology is just so creepy. And outlandish!

  2. For a moment I was hoping they were some of his classic Sci Fi novels, but I see they are in fact some of his bullshit sci fi novels... Disappointing.

    1. WHAT THE -- ?? Some of his classics are good?! Really?!!! You're not just screwing with me, are you? Are you really Tom Cruise behind that computer screen? 'Fess up.

  3. Interesting. I am fascinated by Scientology, I just don't get how it's being tolerated when so many cults go up in flames. Literally. Is it Tom Cruise? I may need to read that last book you mentioned.

  4. You blew off the cobwebs for the shot...cult all the way.