Just a reminder to my fellow Canadians that a new amendment to the Civil Marriage Act goes into effect on this, the first day of April.
Under Section 5 of the act (formerly known as Bill c-38), all Canadians have the right to enter into a same sex union AND an opposite sex union simultaneously. This amelioration is a step forward in the name of equal rights and will be a great boon to the Canadian wedding industry. But it's important that we familiarize ourselves with the new regulations. For the benefit of all, I'll explain it using illustrations of famous Canadians:
Rachel McAdams is legally entitled to marry Ryan Gosling.
Rachel McAdams is also legally entitled to marry Celine Dion.
Under Section 5 of the Civil Marriage Act, Rachel is now allowed to have two spouses at one time, provided they are of different sexes.
If Ryan Gosling doesn't wish to marry Nathan Fillion (which is ridiculous since Nathan probably gives amazing birthday presents and sublime full body massages) he is not obliged to do so. But Ryan Gosling can not convert his right for ONE same-sex marriage into a SECOND opposite-sex marriage.Translation: if Ryan cruelly rejects the love of Nathan, he can NOT take Celine as wife #2, because he's still married to Rachel. It's one vagina or the other. Or one vagina and one penis.
The same goes for Rachel McAdams. If she decided to divorce Celine Dion, she couldn't replace her with Nathan. Hence:
In a related development, the Canadian flag is being revised to look like this:
Please keep in mind that Rachel (and all Canadians) are not obliged to enter into a second marriage -- or even a first marriage -- of either persuasion. But they are obliged to celebrate April Fool's Day.