Saturday, April 20, 2013

What Xenu wants, Xenu gets.

It's my birthday next week, and I have already received several early presents:

Sixteen books comprising The L. Ron Hubbard Series! They are the latest attempt by Scientology to legitimize the cult by getting their propaganda into public libraries. If you are lucky, your library is run by someone who will refuse to add these donations into the collection1. This way when patrons type "Scientology" or "L. Ron Hubbard" or "washed up science fiction writer who invented a religion about aliens in order to make money and rob people of their freedom and money" into the library catalogue they won't be swamped with public relations drivel churned out by Scientology's Planetary Dissemination Organization. Hopefully, instead they will find some of these titles:

Beyond Belief: My Life In And Out Of Scientology by Jenna Miscavige Hill.
Inside Scientology: The Story of America's Most Secretive Religion by Janet Reitman.
Going Clear: Scientology, Hollywood, and the Prison of Belief by Lawrence Wright.

Or better yet,

Dianetics by L. Ron Hubbard. There really is no better indictment of this "church" than the reading the source material first hand.

Despite being chockablock full of crazy drivel, outright lies, paternalistic attitudes, and bad medical advice my new books are beautiful. The paper is glossy and high quality. The bindings are expensive looking. Aesthetically the design and layout is pleasing and engaging. From an early age until he became a hermit in the early eighties, L. Ron enjoyed posing for photos. Many of them are included in the various volumes. My favourite part is that 30% of each book is given over to glossaries of dubious merit and relevance. But they are in keeping with the Scientology's Study Tech education curriculum belief that adherents must analyse and memorize Hubbard-approved definitions of words. Like this one from the Humanitarian: Rehabilitating a Drugged Society volume:

Let me be completely clear: THIS is not what schizophrenic means. If you don't believe me (and you shouldn't) google other sources and/or read this.

In conclusion: there are six more shopping days till my birthday. It's not too late to buy me this:

• • • • • • • • • • • • • •

1 -- other options: have a bonfire, recycle them, put them on the book sale shelf.


  1. I will totally get that for you. There's only seven and a half more shopping hours until my birthday!


      BTW, I was thinking of you earlier. My husband bought dehydrated mango slices.

  2. I am SO going to start my own cult and write my own dictionary. And believe me, mine won't have the same definition for schizophrenic or Scientology.

  3. Some of my favourite posts of yours involve Xenu...what does that say about us? Happy B-day to you both and happy anniversary too!

  4. Apropos of not-this-topic: April has not been NEARLY as much fun as March, when you were there every day with a new blog. Still loving what you do post but, in my own very selfish way, wish it was more frequent. Ran out of Tim Hortons coffee too so just not the best month for me.