Monday, August 5, 2013

A Day Without A Name.

Today is a civic holiday for most Canadians. According to wikipedia, the day is not observed in Newfoundland and Labrador, Quebec, or Yukon. Saskatchewanites are celebrating Saskatchewan Day. Most Ontarians call it Simcoe Day, while others just refer to it as a Civic holiday.  The residents of Guelph call it John Galt Day, in honour of the Scottish novelist not the Ayn Rand character. Nova Scotians call today Natal Day. In Alberta, where I grew up, it's Heritage Day. Festivals are held to celebrate Albertans' ancestral cultures and countries. This usually involves stuffing your face with ethnic foods -- which is a great thing in my opinion. Most provinces simply refer to it as a "civic holiday."

According to various sources I am celebrating BC Day, but I don't hear anyone actually using this term. I think we need to rebrand this day and use it to unite all Canadians.

Some possible new names:

• Ryan Reynolds Place of Birth Day

• Spot the Canadian Landmark Pretending to Be Something Else Day In An American Movie or TV Show Day.

• Bill Shatner Day.

• Hug a Draft Dodger Day.
But be careful, they are really old now.

• Skookum Day.
Everyone says "skookum" as much as possible until we normalize it's usage.

• Goof off on Twitter Day.
This is what I'm doing.

• Waffle Day.
Although quite frankly, every day should be Waffle Day.

• Still Talking About How Our Winter Olympics Kicked Ass Day.

• Group of Seven Day.
We'll all look at their paintings and I will complain that they depress me.

• Finishing Up All The Stupid Garden Projects We Started in May Day.

• Quaid Day.
Everyone drives to the capital and complains that Randy Quaid is pestering the Canadian courts to become a citizen. Alternate name: Star Whacker Day.

• Kinda Sick of Summer Day.
You know it's true. I would like this day to be about acceptance that not everyone enjoys the heat or feels compelled to hang out at the lake. Sometimes it's okay just to stay in the house and kick back and not get heat rash.

• Shit -- I Forgot About Buying Homeschool Curriculum For Next Year Day.
This one really only applies to me. Damn -- that slipped my mind.

• Can Finally Go Outside And Not Be Eaten Alive By Bugs Day.

• Stompin' Tom Day
Every town will sponsor a music festival featuring ONLY his songs.

• Evolution is Real Day
Since there appears to be a few stalwarts who don't think the world is 4.54 billion years old and fail to understand natural selection.

• John A Day.
To celebrate our first Prime Minister and teach our children Canadian history. Mandatory viewing of Canada: A People's History.

Any other suggestions?

1 comment:

  1. Torn between Bill Shatner and Stompin' Tom but Shatner wins based on his rendition of Oh, Canada.